Perfection Page 21

  Rein would have to wake soon, although she didn’t want this time to end. She’d enjoyed spending the night in his arms. Also, he had obviously needed the extra sleep. He’d spent most of the night awake and, every once in a while, his shoulders would shudder as he let loose his grief. She’d stayed silent and let him mourn the loss of his loved one.

  When he finally did fall asleep, his shoulders slumped and his head tilted to the side. His nose nudged the back of her neck, and his soft breaths sent pleasant chills across her skin.

  She should’ve left when his breaths deepened, signaling sleep. She could easily have unwound herself from his grasp and slipped away in the darkness. But she didn’t want to. Her feelings for him ran too deep.

  It was selfish of her to endanger the other inhabitants all because of her weakness in wanting family, of wanting Rein. Of wanting more than she’d had at The Center. She had no desire to lose all she had obtained in a few short weeks.

  The conflict pushing and pulling inside Ellyssa kept her undecided. She fully understood why emotions were forbidden at The Center, how they left people weak, conflicted. She debated, overwhelmed by the sudden onslaught, as if a floodgate had been smashed, and the treacherous feelings gushed like water, rushing through her and washing away everything she had been trained to do, what she had been raised to be.

  She’d have to be careful as she experienced this new life. She must tread lightly. Think clearly. Surely, it was possible. After all, these people didn’t wander around emotional wrecks. All her life, she’d learned to suppress emotions, to mask them. If she was going to openly experience sensations, she was going to have to maintain her composure and do what was right.

  She pulled herself forward and twisted around to look at Rein. His tired lids opened, exposing a magnificent green. He smiled, and her heart skipped a beat.

  “Good morning,” he whispered, pulling her back to him.

  She didn’t struggle, but let his warmth engulf her. She wanted desperately to stay like this, but they couldn’t. She had to convince him to let her go, and lead those hunting her away from his community.

  “The council will be meeting soon,” she said.

  “I know.”

  He nuzzled behind her ear and, for a moment, everything was forgotten. Desire flamed in her midsection, coursing to her nether regions. She bolted upright, hand flying to her mouth.

  “What?” he said, concern lengthening his face.

  She twisted around, her back toward the entrance. Eyes wide, her heart thrumming an ecstatic beat against her chest, she peered at him. She waited for a moment, gauging his reaction, while the alien craving dulled to a low flame, and the pounding in her chest quieted.

  “Nothing,” she said into her palm.

  He reached over and pulled her hand away. Electricity coursed through her from his touch.

  “Did I do something wrong?”

  She shook her head. “No. We should…” She grabbed the music box and handed it to him, hoping to distract him. “Um…we should go to the meeting. I am sure it has started.”

  He set the box down and scooted closer to her. “Ellyssa?” he said, his voice pleading. “What’s wrong?” He brushed a piece of hair back behind her ear. Warmth trailed behind his finger.

  She inhaled, her heart pounding. Releasing the pent-up air, she stared at him, taking in the golden bursts around his pupils.

  “You have to understand. This,” she motioned between them, “is new to me. The feelings I am receiving from your touch are…beyond my ability.”

  Unable to form the correct words to describe the experience, she stopped and looked down. She felt his eyes on her, raking over her. Judging her? She wanted to leap into his head, to know what he was thinking.

  He reached over and lifted her chin, and when her eyes met his, she realized she didn’t need to read his mind. His expression said everything. None of it was judgmental. His eyes held caring, understanding, and something more…desire?…need?…love? It was all so foreign, especially having grown up with nothing but hatred and anger available to her.

  “It’s new to me, too,” he said. “Although different, you aren’t experiencing this alone.”

  She gazed at him for a long while, chewing on her bottom lip, wondering how his lips would feel upon hers. How he tasted. Never had she wanted to know what a kiss felt like, how to initiate such a thing.

  What if he rejected her?

  Rejection? Her heart skipped from light and fluttering to heavy and stone-like.

  “We should be going,” she said, averting her eyes.

  She crawled from the space into the empty passageway. Rein popped out, holding the music box. He grasped her hand and led her down the corridor toward the back.

  “I thought the meeting hall was the other way,” she said, pulling free of his grip.

  He stopped and turned toward her. “It is. I want to put this up.” He held out the box. “Is that okay?”

  She nodded as he reached for her hand again. Entwining her fingers around his, she cherished the feel of his skin against hers, not knowing how long such things would last.

  They followed the set of holeys away from Jordan’s and turned down another passageway. More quarters lay before her, all looking exactly the same, holes carved out of rock.

  He walked to the very end and lifted a red sheet. Squatting, he yanked out a knapsack and a ragged square of an old blanket. He wrapped the box in the blanket and placed it inside the knapsack, then cinched the bag tight and draped it over his shoulder.

  “Let’s go,” he said, capturing her hand again.

  Eric and Brenda looked up from where they sat, at the ends of the rectangular table, when Ellyssa and Rein crossed the threshold. Worry lined each of their faces. A quick glance around confirmed that Mathew wasn’t present, much to Ellyssa’s dismay, and neither was Jason. Both absences, her fault.

  Woody caught her attention with a flick of his head. He smiled when she met his eyes, but when his gaze dropped down to her and Rein’s hands, a small line formed between his brows. His smile faltered for the briefest of seconds, then was replaced with an even wider, albeit forced, one. Crossing his arms across his chest, he looked away and pretended to pick a thread off the sleeve of his shirt.

  Unsure what Woody’s reaction meant, Ellyssa’s eyes moved from him and traveled over the solemn faces. Rein pulled her to the empty chairs next to Woody. Councilmembers’ stares followed. Rein squeezed her hand, but it didn’t alleviate the uncomfortable pressure surrounding her.

  Ellyssa wanted to know what they were thinking. What they believed had happened last night. Did they blame her? That had been Rein’s and Mathew’s first inclination. Why should they be any different? Unlike Rein, the doctor, or even Woody, they barely knew her. Why shouldn’t they place fault on her?

  Ellyssa’s head lowered, unwilling to look at the others. She concentrated, hard, zeroing on Brenda. The older woman’s mind opened to her like a blooming flower. Within the din of the other’s thoughts, Ellyssa was able to glean that Brenda knew Jason was hurt, and speculations were floating around the community.

  She shifted to Eric, who thought Jason had gotten off too easy, if what Mathew had said was true. Then the static and buzz broke her concentration and incapacitated her ability to read. She raised her wall.

  “No one is blaming you for anything, hon,” said Eric as if he knew she was snooping.

  Steadying her emotions, she looked at Eric. “I am sorry for causing trouble, but I will protect myself,” she stated.

  Even Ellyssa could hear the monotone of her voice. It sounded heartless and cold. Robotic. She’d never really paid attention to the sound before. She shifted in her seat, trying to relax.

  Eric and Brenda looked at each other, the sudden change in her demeanor surprising them. Eric lifted a shoulder and returned his attention to Ellyssa. “When Jason fully recovers, he will stand trial.”

  “You have trials?”

  “Of course,” said Re
in. “That surprises you?”

  “Yes. Society does not have lawbreakers. The gene for deviant behavior is tested in vitro, and if it is found, the baby is aborted.”

  Brenda leaned forward, obviously appalled. “The woman isn’t even given a choice. It’s one of the many reasons I left.”

  “Ha,” Eric said, “that’s laughable.”

  Narrowing her eyes, Brenda shot him a look. “What?”

  “No, not that. You misunderstand.” Eric chuckled. “You’re a criminal. And so is Woody, for that matter.”

  “Hmm, you’re right,” Brenda said, settling back in the chair.

  Eric turned his gaze on Ellyssa. “Doesn’t seem their way really works.”

  A small smile formed on Ellyssa’s lips. “There are many flaws in society.”

  “Here, we have trials. And Jason will have his chance to plead his case,” Rein continued.

  “So,” Eric said to Rein, “Doc filled me in on a few of the details last night. Why don’t you finish?”

  Rein launched into the story, starting with the old barn and ending with leaving the truck behind and sneaking away. As he spoke, Ellyssa’s smooth countenance melted, and she shuddered with impending horror. Sooner or later, the police would find the Renegades.

  “The barn is about fifty kilometers away,” he concluded. “That’s what took us so long to return, and empty-handed.”

  Eric placed his elbows on the table, clasping his hands. “They’re close.”

  “We need to start evacuation procedures right away,” piped in Woody.

  Ellyssa shook her head. “No. They are after me. If I turn myself in, they will go.”

  “Uh-uh,” Rein protested. He turned toward her, the sunburst around his pupils darkened a shade. He gathered her hands into his. “This is your home now.”

  For a moment, as the warmth of his touch singed her skin and traveled through her body, she drowned in his green pools and wanted to believe. To be part of a family, and accepted, and explore the sensations Rein evoked in her.

  But she couldn’t.

  The danger was too great. If the Renegades were discovered, they would be murdered.

  “Do not be ridiculous, Rein,” Ellyssa said. “It is far too dangerous.”

  “I agree with Ellyssa,” Brenda said.

  Rein faced Brenda. “It’s not going to happen. I don’t care what you say. If it was anyone else in the community, we would protect them. Ellyssa is now part of the community, whether you,” he pointed at Brenda, “accept it or not. Jordan trusted her and made her a councilmember. We will honor his request.”

  Ellyssa placed her hand on his forearm. “Rein, listen.”

  A grimace tightening the corners of his mouth, he pulled away. “No,” he repeated.

  Ready to argue, Ellyssa scooted her chair back, preparing to stand, but a light touch on her shoulder stopped her.

  “He’s right,” Woody said.

  “No, he is not,” she said. “I will do what I have to do.”

  “Wait a minute,” Woody said, cutting Rein off in the middle of an objection. “They know we’re here.”

  “Why do you say that?”

  “It has been weeks. They should have moved on. They haven’t.”

  “That does not prove anything.”

  “But it does. Rein said they had dogs. They tracked your scent.”

  Which stopped at the store where the Renegades found me.

  “Your scent was lost within ours,” Woody said, finishing her thought. “They might not know exactly where, but they know there is a group of us somewhere within the vicinity.”

  “But, if I turn myself in…”

  “Do you honestly think they will stop the search for us?”

  Ellyssa didn’t answer. She knew they wouldn’t.

  “Time to vote,” Rein said, a smile of satisfaction spread across his face.

  “No. It is my decision.”

  “Oh no, it’s not. We do this the democratic way.”

  Her mouth parted in protest, but Rein held his hand up.

  “You accepted the invitation to be part of the council. You follow the rules.” Rein turned toward the others. “All in favor of protecting a member of the community?”

  Rein, Woody, and Eric raised their hands.

  “Brenda?”

  The middle-aged female looked at Ellyssa, sorrow tugging her doe-like eyes. “I’m sorry, but no. I think it’s better for you to leave.”

  “Rein, I agree. Maybe if I go to them, I can lead them from you.”

  “Majority rules.”

  A sliver of hope entered. “What about Mathew? And Jason? They have not voted.”

  “Doc’s vote is for you to stay, and Jason is temporarily suspended from his duties,” Woody said. “Ellyssa, you know as well as I do that nothing you say will stop them from looking.”

  “There might be—”

  He patted her hand. “You’re one of us now. Please.”

  Ellyssa closed her eyes, wishing for a moment that she’d never followed Jeremy’s phantom voice.

  “We need to hold a community meeting. Evacuation plans need to be implemented,” said Eric.

  As their voices droned on about a section of the cave that needed preparation, Ellyssa listened halfheartedly. She should just leave and lead the Gestapo away on a fake trail. It would buy the Renegades time to relocate before the police came back to exterminate them.

  Ellyssa’s eyes moved from one face to the other as the members discussed plans. None of them had any idea how relentless her father was. Dr. Hirch wouldn’t stop until she was back in his hands; he wouldn’t stop until they had been annihilated.

  She had inadvertently signed these people’s death warrants.

  29

  Hunched over, Angela darted behind an overgrown bush. She had her assigned electroshock weapon drawn, as if that would do any good. Even with the knowledge of Renegades definitely hiding in the forest, Dr. Hirch still forbade the use of guns, fearing an accidental shooting of his precious children. At least she had a real gun strapped to her ankle just in case she ran into one of the lowlifes. To hell with the consequences, they were armed.

  She looked over her shoulder to see if Dyllon was in position. With a lift of his head, Dyllon acknowledged he was ready, then ducked behind a pile of rumpled tin sheets and rusted nails, the remnants of an old shed. A large oak grew from within the rubble.

  The house hadn’t fared much better. The roof was nonexistent. As for the walls, only one still remained partially erect, crumbling bricks threatening to collapse at any moment. A variety of bushes and plants had taken root, slowly returning the man-made structure to nature.

  She wished she’d thought better of listening to Micah. After all, he had been wrong about Davis. If she were to be truthful, her initial instincts had been wrong about the ranger, too.

  The ranger had gone to Kansas City to visit his parents, just as he had said. The police who had conducted the interviews had found nothing suspicious, except that the ranger had loaded two small boxes into his truck before he’d left. Most likely supplies, and hardly enough to support a community of Renegades. Davis was nothing more than a quiet man who kept to himself. No wonder he was a park ranger. A perfect predetermined career for him.

  Not only had The Center’s child screwed up her revenge upon Ellyssa, he’d screwed up her whole investigation, making her second guess herself by listening to him. First he wanted to waste time tailing Davis, then he insisted they wasted more time driving around, sightseeing.

  Squatting behind a bush, Angela faced the woods. Trees grew densely around the overgrown field. She could make out a couple of rusted metal rods, leftovers of an old fence, poking from the ground.

  They were wasting time. If not for Micah, they could be doing something more productive, like looking for clues to where Ellyssa hid. Instead, they were on this wild goose chase that Micah refused to talk about.

  Angela had to admit, though, at first she had been convinc
ed Micah had found something. After he had ordered Captain Jones to stop, he’d popped out of the vehicle to touch a toppled tree. Then Micah’s eyes leveled with hers, and he told her this was the place. After the drive had been cleared, there were signs of tire tracks and clumps of crushed grass. For the first time in days, Angela’s interest had been piqued and her hopes had soared.

  Now though, after seeing the ruins of the old farm, she began to doubt. There was no way this wreckage held a secret storage cache.

  She glanced at Micah, who had ignored her orders to advance slowly. His blond hair reflected the light of the Indian summer sun as he kicked the wreckage. He glanced at her before bending over and coming up with what looked like the edge of a broken tin sheet in his hand. Smugness traveled across his face before it faded. On first glance, she thought it was debris, but then she noticed the arc in which it moved, as if attached to hinges. His head bobbed out of sight, she heard the thud of the door closing.

  “Dyllon,” she beckoned, while rounding the heap to where Micah had just stood.

  Dyllon trotted after her, his forehead bunched together. She knelt on her haunches, poking through the ruins. Bricks, dead branches, and other trash littered the ground around the tin sheet. At first glance, the heap looked as if it was nothing more than rubble, but when Angela really looked at it, she saw the telltale signs. The bricks were arranged in staggering stacks, the branches aligned to hide the entrance. She shook her head and stood.

  Once again, if it hadn’t been for Micah, she would never have seen it, mistaking the debris for what it appeared like, a mound of scrap. Although she hated The Center’s children, she had to admit their extraordinary abilities were useful.

  “He went down there?” asked Dyllon as he pulled he grabbed the edge of the door. It opened smoothly and revealed wooden steps, leading into darkness.

  Angela switched on her flashlight. Well-maintained steps led to a dirt floor. Sighing, she descended, sweeping her light back and forth, and stepped into a basement carved into the ground. Along the walls, vertical chinks marked where picks and shovels had been used to dig the hole. Rafters, covered in an oily substance, ran the length every two meters. Angela touched a post closest to the stairway. A preservative stained her fingertips. She wiped her hand on her pants.